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But where will Turbo and Ozone work now?

January 12, 2006

Looking back, I know why Shabadoo’s closed down. Aside from being a breakdancing-themed diner, whenever the waitress, wearing her Adidas track suit, brought you your diner, she’d say “You got served!” But most of the time you had to correct them and say “Um, no I didn’t get served because I still don’t have my French onion soup.” Then invariably they’d spill it on you because they just couldn’t put it down in front of you. They had to do that whole robot pop-and-lock stuff before serving you.

And if you ordered the Boogaloo Shrimp special, the head waiter would hold the plate in one hand and do the worm all the way from the kitchen to your table. 60 percent of the time he made it without dropping it, which was very impressive. But the other 40 percent of the time it was god damn annoying. Many a night a customer would scream “Just give me the fucking plate!”

But you never minded tipping 15 percent at Shabadoo’s, ’cause the wait staff would dance for it. They’d break out the flattened cardboard boxes and the boom box and do some wicked windmills and hand plants.

Here’s hoping they put a diner in that space that has a Tron theme, because I want to eat an omelette off a glowing disc while light cycles bring me free refills of soda.

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