Coupling with the stars

“So Carmen Electra and Joan Jett are dating,” says Anonymous Doug.

This causes me to choke on my scotch and Gatorade.

“What’s with that reaction?” asks Anonymous Doug.

“I’m sorry, but that’s the hottest thing I’ve ever heard,” I say. “Carmen Electra’s hot, and Joan Jett is the goddess of rock. Their being together is so hot it defies the laws of thermodynamics.”

“So you’re saying there is no coupling hotter than that of Carmen Electra and Joan Jett?” says Anonymous Doug.

“Not to my knowledge,” I say.

“What about someone else’s knowledge?” says Anonymous Doug.

So we call up Mikka at home and ask him what would be hotter than Carmen Electra and Joan Jett dating.

“Maybe if the Baroness fron G.I. Joe and April O’Neil from the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon got together,” says Mikka.

“That’s not quite what we were looking for,” I say.

“Hey, you didn’t say I had to keep it within the bounds of reality,” says Mikka.

“But could you keep it within the bounds of healthy sexual thought?” I say.

“Uh, no,” says Mikka.

“Well, he’s thinking outside the box,” says Anonymous Doug. “It’s just that the box is animated.”

“But I don’t think his Baroness/April O’Neil combo beats Carmen Electra/Joan Jett,” I say.

We called up Tina the Lesbian, but she agreed with us that Carmen Electra and Joan Jett is the hottest couple ever.

We called up the Guinness Book of World Records and asked them if they had a hottest couple ever entry. They hung up on us. Not the first this has happened.

We’re waiting for the entertainment magazines to start calling this coupling “JettLectra.” And when they do I want credit for coming up with that phrase for their celebrity relationship.

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