Zero to Awkward in Three SecondsMay 14, 2008
It’s last call, and as the lights come up in the bar, I get the stupid notion to try to be profound.
“You know, I think if they sung the Carmina Burana in English, it wouldn’t be as cool,” I say.
“I think Melanie makes me do her in the ass just so she doesn’t have to look at me while we fuck,” says Anonymous Doug.
“Who is Melanie?” I ask.
“I don’t even think she knows who she truly is,” says Anonymous Doug.
“Well, whoever she is, she’s shallow and likes anal,” I say.
“And she cries when she comes too,” says Anonymous Doug. “They ain’t happy tears either. It’s like a family member died or something. No idea what that’s about.”
Well, this evening has taken a turn for the… well, I’m not sure what to call it but it scares me.