Feline Rail Line is Divine

June 18, 2008

There’s a cat in Japan who is the master of a railway station. So I asked the cat expert what this is about.

“Well, with gas prices shooting up so high, mass transit is going to be big,” says Bernie the Half-Cyborg Cat. “And so we’re getting into key positions so when the time comes to strike we will control all transportation.”

“I wasn’t aware cats knew the concept of mass transit,” I say.

“We’ve already learned how the buses work,” says Bernie. “That cat in England broke that code for us.”

So now that I know that cats have infiltrated the highest ranks of our mass transit systems, I write a letter to my state senator.

Dear Senator,

My local paper says you have consistently voted against expanding mass transit in our state. Is it because cats own it? Maybe you should tell people about that. It would probably help your polling. Please respond like you usually do to me, by planting secret coded messages in my issues of Esquire magazine.

And in an interview with Colin Farrell, I find out that my senator has no comment on the issue.


One comment

  1. I can haz train powerz.

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