Qualified to fail miserably

July 8, 2008

So I’m having dinner with John McCain, because he’s paying, and as went get to dessert I see that he’s unhappy with his creme brule.

“This creme brule tastes like shit,” John McCain says. “Damn it, I can make a better creme brule! I was in a Vietnamese prison camp for five years!”

“What does that have to do with being able to make a tasty creme brule?” I say.

“Don’t denigrate my service to this nation, you trollopy cunt!” McCain yells at me. “Getting shot down over Vietnam qualifies me for many things. Like making gourmet desserts or performing open heart surgery.”

“You flew planes, you weren’t a medic,” I say. “You can’t do open heart surgery.”

“If you would stop hating the troops for a minute, I’ll show you how those years in a bamboo cage qualified me to build webpages for a living,” says John McCain.

“You don’t even use the Internet,” I say. “And unless the Vietnamese knew all about HTML back then, I don’t think you’re qualified to make webpages just because you were a prisoner of war.”

“I drank my own pee!” says John McCain. “Now shut up and let me overhaul your transmission.”

Well, seeing how his wife is super rich, I will say that John McCain is qualified to pay for dinner.




  1. *snort*

    And so they march on, regardless.

  2. Is he qualified to wear a corset?

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