Tag Larkin is a particular man

August 19, 2008

Tag Larkin is a particular man.

When Tag Larkin goes to the pub for drinks, he always sits at the same place at the bar.  And if someone is sitting there, well, they’re not sitting there for long.  He doesn’t say why he always needs to sit there, and if you ask him you get punched in the ear.  All you need to know is…

Tag Larkin is a particular man…

When Tag Larkin goes to the supermarket to shop for various melons, he spends most of the time searching for ones of a particular size because he says they taste the best. Namely the ones that are Alyssa Milano’s breast size. And so to check for this, Tag Larkin brings a 34B bra into the supermarket and places each prospective melon in the cups to see if the melons makes the grade. Tag Larkin doesn’t just eat any melon because…

Tag Larkin is a particular man.

Tag Larkin likes blonde women. Tag Larkin does not like women who dye their hair blonde, as he’s sensitive to peroxide. If you go on a dinner date with Tag Larkin and he finds out you dye your hair, Tag Larkin will not only throw his drink in your face, he’ll throw your drink in your face. And not just the liquid part either. Tag Larkin will throw his whole glass/teacup/pitcher at you, and if he’s got the chance he’ll order another drink just to do it again. Tag Larkin does not abide from the blonde-from-a-bottle types because…

Tag Larkin is a particular man.

And why is Tag Larkin a particular man?  Because if you were Tag Larkin, wouldn’t you be particular too?




  1. It seems that Tag Larkin has the undeniable right to be particular.

    It’s odd…I use my bra to buy melons too. Hmmm.

  2. Damn straight I would.

  3. Rassles, do you ever get any funny looks in the supermarket?

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