The Holistic Approach to Avoiding Your Problems

February 12, 2009

Here’s something you don’t see every day… Ninja Vicki and Avonia the Wiccan Pimp hanging out together in the park. I guess it’s not too odd. Avonia likes being around nature, and Ninja Vicki likes to hide in the trees.

“So, do you know any spells that get rid of depression?” Ninja Vicki asks.

“There are rituals, but I’m not sure you’re in good standing with Kwan Yin and Kali,” says Avonia the Wicca Pimp.

“What about herbal stuff?” says Ninja Vicki.

“St. John’s wort is supposed to alleviate the symptoms of depression,” says Avonia.

“Great, I know where I can steal a whole bunch of that stuff,” says Ninja Vicki.

“But you should really look to directly treating the cause of your troubles,” says Avonia.

“Damn it, I was hoping to avoid that,” says Ninja Vicki.

“You tend to avoid a lot of things,” Avonia says.

“That’s what ninjas do,” says Ninja Vicki. “We avoid everything.”

“Well that might be all fine and good for assassinations and thievery, but it’s not good for dealing with life’s problems,” says Avonia. “You need to face your issues and talk about them to someone.”

“Like you?” says Ninja Vicki.

“If you feel comfortable, sure,” says Avonia.

Avonia would come to regret this, as she soon learned that ninjas don’t respect personal boundaries when Ninja Vicki jumped through her bedroom window at 3am that night for a talk about her tendency to only want men who don’t want her. Yes, Avonia and her husband Arawn were unpleasantly surprised, but when you open yourself up to the issues of ninjas these sort of things should be expected.

avonia smallnote


One comment

  1. Hey I’m open all hours for psychotherapy. Send Ninja Vicki to me….

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