The Equinox That Rocks Your Socks

September 22, 2009

It’s Autumn Equinox so it’s a good time to check in on Avonia the Wiccan Pimp and see what she’s doing for Mabon.

“Ugh… don’t remind me,” groans Avonia.  “Our drummers aren’t showing up because they’re taking their summer vacation late this year because of better rates on airfare and hotels.  There’s already disagreements on who’s doing the Quarters.  And if Linette complains one more time about not doing the invocation so help me goddess I will witch-slap the taste out of her mouth.”

“Another drama filled sabbat, eh?”  I say.

“I envy you atheists at times,” says Avonia.  “How much drama can there be-”

Just then Tag Larkin runs up besides us.  “Avonia, Tag Larkin is happy for you and stuff, but Tag Larkin just has to say that Tag Larkin had one of the best meatball sandwiches of all time.  Of all time!”

And then Tag Larkin runs away.

“What the heck was that?”  says Avonia.

“That was Tag Larkin,” I say.

“I know who Tag Larkin is,” says Avonia.

“You lie!”  Tag Larkin yells from across the steet.  “No one truly knows Tag Larkin.”

“Tag Larkin saw those inappropriate outbursts from Kanye West and Congressman Joe Wilson and perceived them as affronts to his Tagness,”  I say to Avonia.   “So now he just goes around interrupting people.”

“How long is he going to do this for?”  Avonia asks.

“Until he gets distracted with something else,” I say.

“It’s already gotten annoying,” says Avonia.

Tag Larkin runs back over to us.  “Avonia, Tag Larkin knows you’re annoyed and stuff, but Tag Larkin just has to say that Tag Larkin just saved a ton of money on his car insurance. A ton of money.”

Tag Larkin runs away again.

“I’m surprised they let even Tag Larkin have a driver’s license,” says Avonia.

But Avonia shouldn’t be, because Tag Larkin isn’t licensed to drive vehicles.  Vehicles are licensed to be driven by Tag Larkin.  Often into the front of people’s houses.

avonia smallnote




  1. sounds like avonia needs to get laid. is she licensed to be driven by Tag Larkin?

  2. That pretty well describes my Mabon. Without Tag Larkin, though.

  3. Tag Larkin needs some new drugs

    • Tag Larkin is all-natural. 100% Tag. No preservatives or fillers.

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