This lady’s got some uncommonly broad shoulders…

September 30, 2009

“Doug, do you ever wake up and feel like a fraud?”  I say with a sigh.

“What?  Like a trannie?”  says Anonymous Doug.  “Well, not in the morning. Maybe late at night, after a lot of drinks, but it was really dark in the bar.”

“Um, no I wasn’t-”

“The adam’s apple is usually the giveaway,” continues Anonymous Doug.  “But if they got that covered with a turtleneck top or jewelry the next best thing is the feet.”

“Doug, this isn’t-”

“Because for all the make-up and costuming trannies do, they can’t fix those awful man feet of theirs,” says Anonymous Doug.  “They ain’t like women’s feet.  Real women’s feet, I mean.  Paint ’em, shave ’em, do what you want to ’em but I can pick a dude’s feet out of a lineup every damn time.”

“You do know your feet, no doubt about that,” I say. “But I’m not talking about trannies.”

“Well maybe you should be,” says Anonymous Doug.  “Few things ruin a night like gender identity issues.  Even worse in the morning.  I know if I woke up next to a trannie, my whole day would probably be shot to hell.”

Leave it to an anonymous man to put things in perspective.





  1. Anonymous Doug has never seen the Thai Ladyboyz in Bangkok…

  2. I was going to attempt a in depth comment regarding the subject at hand(people not allowing others to finish their statements, not trannies), but my mind has been blown by the priceless wisdom presented in this story.

  3. No, actually. I never feel like a fraud. Sometimes I feel like a liar, though.

    And I can totally always spot the trannies. Doug’s right, it’s all about the feet.

    Unless s/he is wearing boots…

  4. I think ladyboys have small shoulders.

  5. What are you feeling fraudulent about RF?

    • I forget what I was feeling fraudulent about. I originally wrote this post like three weeks ago, but I put off posting it because I had better, more timely material. But if it’s like my other neuroses it’ll come back.

  6. they always come back… best to drown ’em

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